2007/10/12
2007/10/12 GOOD BYE,BRO.
I love Friday. The reason for that is really simple. I love weekends when there’s no school. On this noon of the day, I went out with my brother and had chosen spaghettis for our lunch. I love to eat all kinds of delicacies. After the lunch, I get home and have a nap in between the next classes. By the time it’s the time ready to go to school, it started to rain. As for today, I had a great time with my brother. Nothing really has happened special on this day. So I have to leave my last words here. I simply hope to have a nice weekend with my brother because he’s going back to the camp on Saturday.
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"On this noon of the day," = Chinese English. This is very far from natural English structure. You'd have to say something like "At noon today, another wonderful Friday" -- you want to make sure the reader knows that today, October 12, the day you are posting your blog entry, is Friday.
"Spaghetti", the singular, is proper here. It's a non-count noun and should almost never be used in the plural.
Spaghetti is hardly a "delicacy", though. Not even in Taiwan. Collins Cobuild defines that word as "4 A delicacy is a rare or expensive food that is considered especially nice to eat.
Smoked salmon was considered an expensive delicacy... N-COUNT". Good spaghetti might be a delicacy, even in the USA, which has millions of Italian restaurants.
"After lunch" is normal.
"I went home and took a nap".
Your tenses are mixed up. You switch between simple past and simple present. It doesn't matter which tense you use to tell a story -- you can use either for this story -- but you must be consistent.
"As for today, I had a great time with my brother." There's nothing really wrong with this sentence, but it's in the wrong place. That means that your paragraph is disorganized. The sentence belongs after "I love to eat all kinds of delicacies." If you put it there, though, you can delete "as for today" because it is no longer necessary.
"Nothing really has happened special on this day." This contradicts the feeling in your paragraph. You called spaghetti a delicacy, and you said that you had a "great time". Do you eat delicacies every day? Do you have a great time with your brother (or anyone else) every day?
"So I have to leave my last words here." This must be a direct translation from Chinese. It's meaningless nonsense in English.
Your final sentence is problematic. First, you need to tell us a little more about "camp". I have to assume that your brother is in the military and that he's going back to his military base (commonly called "camp" in English). But that has to be made clear. Second, the conclusion of your paragraph is not appropriate: your final sentence is about your brother, but the topic sentence is about how you love Friday. They aren't connected, unless you see your brother every Friday. But because you didn't say that, and because it seems unlikely that anyone in the military would have every Friday off, I's guess that this is not the case.
While your main points are clear enough, they are disorganized and expressed in unnatural English.
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